||[Feb. 1st, 2006|12:05 am]
Don't Buy Every Cute Pet You See Support Group
Since I lost my twenty year old cat Spock last October, I've been trying to fill the empty void she left behind. Three months on I'm only just starting to realise that she won't be there to greet me home everyday in the kitchen.
My mum and I just had a bit of an arguement. I didn't say much, but I was giving her 'attitude' when asked to scrub and disinfect the bath after I gave my three rats a bath in it. I had already rinsed it down, and I know its stupid, but I felt....offended by her asking me clean it more than I had as if my rats carried rabies or something. When we gave Spock the odd bath for some reason or another, she never told me to disinfect it then....I just can't help but feel extremely defensive about them. I'm so protective and obsessed with the care of my pets now Spock is gone. Its as if all my energy from her has transferred to the rest.
Since Spock died I have aquired two new pets despite not being allowed any. Seth, my milksnake, and Metal Gary, a giant African snail. But after each one I've found it hasn't worked. My snake hasn't eaten yet, due to a three month long hibernation, so I haven't even been able to hold him properly or get to know him...and there's only so much you can do with a snail, although I love them both so so much.
And now I find myself looking out for other low-maintentence pets that don't require a vet like my snail...but I need to stop and remember they will never fill that void.
I just still feel so sad, but I have to stop with the pets and get over this somehow, although I don't know how to go about it or if this feeling will actually fade eventually....